The following is a post from a Facebook physician group.  I thought it was worth repeating here...

"...I am not happy, but I can't do ...."

I see a lot of comments like "I can't do this because of this or that". Sorry, but that doesn't cut it with me. (A bit of tuff love).

The ONLY reason you can't do it is that you are looking at YOUR world through tight blinders. TAKE THE BLINDERS OFF. START LOOKING AT THE WHOLE WORLD. LOOK AT ALL POSSIBILITIES.

Now having said that, it may be difficult. It may be hard. It may be a sacrifice, but here is the truth: Physicians are smart people and can do a lot. They can do medicine...and other things also. But only if you explore them. Decide on them and then execute on your decision.

For example...look at your average healthcare CEO. Why can't you do it? You won't likely get the CEO job initially, but certainly some other positions and move up. You don't have any God-given right to start at the top, just because you are a physician. Play IN the game, and not expect to get any special consideration.

If you say "you can't do it", it's only because you are unwilling to change. You are unwilling to learn something new. You are unwilling to give up your comfort zone. In that case...face reality. Don't blame the system for being stuck in it.

Tony Robbins said,

"YOU GET WHAT YOU ACCEPT"

Those are powerful words to live by. Remember them. If you accep...

If I only had this, I would be happy.

If only this had not happened, it would make me happy.

Does this sound like you?

Is happiness just a bit beyond your reach? 

Is there just one more thing until you achieve it?

Perhaps it's better to look to achieve happiness with what you already have.

Being grateful and happy for what you have is a great place to launch yourself to an even greater degree of happiness.

Sunday Morning Happiness

It's Sunday morning.  Nothing special happening.  Just sitting on the couch with a warm cup of coffee.  Nothing planned.  Just a quiet day.  We are just relaxing on the couch.  The dogs are fed, content and sleeping.  I am enjoying writing this post for you.

Life is good.

Are there some less than bucolic elements happing in my life?  Probably, but for now, I am grateful for what I have. Where I am. What I am doing. Who I am with. I am happy.

Am I doing anything special that I am doing to make me happy?  Am I trying to make myself happy by an external stimulus?  Nope.  It's all internal.  It's being grateful for what I have.  Not seeking out anything more at this moment.  Being happy with the way things are. 

Being "Present" and Grateful

Being present is different from being grateful, but I believe they are closely related.  You can be present in the moment and be unhappy (or happy).  But being present gives us the ability to see what we h...

Who is responsible for your happiness?

You?

Or Someone else?

First of all, where does happiness reside?  Is happiness something that is outside of you?  Is it something that someone can give you?  Or is it inside of your head? Something deeply personal. 

Why is it that some people with so much abundance in their lives ... are deeply unhappy?

Why is it that some people who face such daunting challenges such as illness, being destitute or facing oppression ... are able to be deeply happy?

Perhaps it can be summed up in two words.

• Gratefulness
• Choice

Do you believe that happiness is a choice that you can make?  One that allows you to be happy, grateful and satisfied without physical "things"?  

Are you grateful for what you have?   If not, why not?

Make it your choice to be happy.

 Create your own happiness. 

Did you ever wonder why something was done?  Not just completed, but why it was done ... on a much deeper level.

Just how do you go about figuring that out?  There are so many different ways of attacking the question. Just how do you get to the root?  It's simpler than you may think.  Just ask a kid how they learn.

It's the Five Whys.

The system is deceptively simple and the results are astonishingly insightful.  Let's do an example. 

Let's look at why we lock the doors to our houses.  Start off with the first question, then ask another why question ... formulated from the previous answer.  Do it five times. Five levels deep.  Sometimes you get an answer sooner, sometimes you can go even deeper.  

Why do we lock the doors to our homes? To keep people out.

Why do we keep people out? Because some people we don't want in our house.

Why don't we want them in our house? Because we don't want them stealing from us.

Why will they steal from us?  Because they want our stuff to get money.

Why do they want money? Because they don't have a job.

So you can see, one of the reasons that we lock our doors is that there are people who don't have a job that may steal from us.  (No social commentaries allowed here...this is an illustration).

Let's try another.  This is one that I did with my kids when they were small.  It went something like this:

Kids, you need to do your homework. ...

Once I learn this, I will upgrade to something better.

When I need those functions, I will change to something that has them.

I will start with this because I can afford it.

What excuses do you have for using substandard tools?

It's not that the tool that you picked is bad, but perhaps you were not looking at the big picture.

The tool I am talking about here is mostly software, but it can apply to power tools, vacuum cleaners, hedge cutters or just about anything else.

When picking a tool that we need, we often use criteria that really doesn't support our long term use of the tool.  We look for inexpensive.  Easy to use.  But those criteria may not serve us well in the long run.

If we need to upgrade later, or if we need additional functions, then we have to start the whole process over again.  Time wasted on the second decision process. 

If we need to buy another product, the money from the first purchase would have offset part of the price of the second.

Time Is Money Too

Perhaps the biggest problem with buying something with the anticipation of upgrading later is this:  You have spent time and money two times to essentially buy a single solution.  Moreover, you are spending time learning two products, rather than spending all of that time on one product and becoming more expert at it.  

Buying Recommendation

If you are going to buy a tool that you will anticipate...

Managing Your Emotions

Have you ever exploded emotionally ... over something that really didn't matter?

If you said no, you are either very well adjusted, have control over your emotions, or are telling yourself untruths (the new buzzword for lying.)

So what can you do to help prevent inappropriate reactions to the curveballs that life throws at you?

Perhaps adjusting your perspective can help.  

But how?  How can one easily adjust perspective in such cases?  What can you do?

Generating An Appropriate Reaction

It may not be true for everything, but here is how I do it.

Before I ramp up my emotions for those curveballs...I tell myself something:

If this is the worst thing that happens to me today ... Life is Good.

Got a fender bender?  Life is good.

Got a "C" on an exam? Life is good.

Spill your drink in your lap at lunch? Life is good.

 It's all about generating an honest and optimistic perspective. That helps us keep the perspective of events appropriate.  Most of what life throws at us is temporary, non-life threatening and manageable.  If that's the case, then why go crazy?  After all...

If this is the worst thing that happens to me today ... Life is Good.